|
What to Do When a Co-Worker
Drives You Crazy
By: Lynne
Eisaguirre
 Maybe
the guy in the cubicle next to you smacks his gum all day,
or maybe he's a loud-talker.
Could be your nemesis at
work is constantly complaining and spewing negative
comments. Whoever is bothering you at work can have the
power to turn a good day into a bad one. Reclaim your sanity
and find your workplace Zen with some tips on how to cope.
|
|
Is it
them or you?
How do you decide who is truly difficult? A good test is
this: Does the person's behavior have an impact on your
individual or team performance? If not, it's eccentric,
"rascally" behavior and you need to manage your own
attitude. If the person is keeping you from doing your best
work, it may be because of what you're doing.
Next figure out why this person drives you crazy. Is it
something that "triggers" you or reminds you of your own
issues?
It's important that you don't impose your own triggers or
issues on your coworkers. You have no right to darken the
doorsteps of colleagues with your own issues. If you realize
you're struggling with an issue, take action and get help.
Are they doing it just to piss you
off?
When someone at work drives you batty, it helps to consider
whether there are generational, cultural or ethnic
differences that may be contributing to the clashes. The
workplace has become increasingly diverse which sometimes
makes good communication difficult, but even more important.
I am also of the opinion that people are hardwired with
certain personality characteristics, some of which can be
extremely annoying. Understanding how other people's brains
might be hardwired can help us cope with their seemingly
bizarre (to us) behavior.
And sometimes there's an underlying medical reason for a
coworker's bad behavior. The reality is that they may be
suffering from depression or undergoing medical treatment
that is affecting them. Consider the fact that the difficult
person in your work group may not just be difficult, but
very ill.
When to shrug it off
So how do you deal? Sometimes, it's worthwhile to revert to
that time-honored teen behavior: the shrug. Pretend that
you're a self-absorbed adolescent and you'll find that you
can simply shrug and look the other way. It'll probably even
feel great!
If the shrug doesn't work and the person is really keeping
you from doing your best work and you've done your best to
ignore him or her it's time to get serious about a solution.
Confronting your coworker
If you've decided you have to do something about a
coworker's annoying behavior, prepare for your conversation
and have it face-to-face, and in private. If you can't speak
in person then pick up the phone and have a real-time
conversation, don't just leave voice mails. And never,
never, address the issue via e-mail. Once relationships
tank, e-mailing only escalates the feud.
Before you meet, figure out exactly what your complaints
are. When speaking to your coworker, be as specific as
possible. Instead of asking them to change an attitude,
spell out exactly what the annoying behavior is and what
you'd like them to do to remedy the situation.
Tackle one topic at a time and focus on eliminating the
biggest problem or the easiest to solve. Then, after you've
stated your case, recap what you've spoken about, what you
expect the other person to do and then thank them for their
cooperation and tell them you look forward to a better
working relationship.
Then what? Leave. Don't hover or nag, just go away.
About
the Author: Is Your Boss Driving You Crazy?"
Find out what to do at
http://www.workplacesthatwork.com Lynne Eisaguirre is a
workplace expert, author of six books on workplace issues,
including the recent Stop Pissing Me Off! What To Do When
People You Work With Drive You Crazy, and a former
employment attorney.
|
